How often do you get into arguments? With your kids, your spouse, roommate, co-workers, or family members? Well here is a verse that could improve your relationships and maybe even save one....
"It is to one's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel." ~Proverbs 20:3 (NIV)
Getting into petty arguments (strife) is an easy thing to do; Proverbs says that fools are quick to quarrel. Fools
are often mentioned in the book of Proverbs and in many of those
references it says that fools will come to ruin. In other words, their
actions and ways don't achieve for them success. Being quick to enter
into petty arguments (or even not-so-petty arguments) generally doesn't
achieve for us success. So, is there a better way?
consider the first part of Proverbs 20:3, "It is to one's honor to avoid
strife...." Think about that statement for a moment. To whom do we
normally give honor? Whom do we generally esteem? As you think through
the list of people you have great respect for, I'm gonna go out on a
limb here and guess that they probably aren't known for getting into
arguments. In some way they have learned to stay away from arguments and
yet they are still successful - in fact, they have your respect.
To be clear, arguments and confrontation aren't necessarily the same
thing. Sometimes we need to confront someone who is on the wrong path or
who is acting in destructive ways (destructive to either themselves or
to those around them or to the organization of which they are a part).
Jesus made this point very clear in Matthew 18:15-17. There are times
when it is right to - in fact God expects us to - confront people.
But generally our strife/arguments don't come from those kinds of
situations. If you find yourself getting into arguments on a regular
basis, you need to ask yourself, "Why do I do that?" Also, consider the
end result of those arguments. Are they really achieving for you a
better life? Are they really improving your relationships? Do they
change the people with whom you argue? Once you start to drill down on
these kinds of questions, you'll begin to see things more clearly, and
when you see more clearly you'll be able to make better choices.
Think on these things and you'll be glad you did.